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Love & Dating


She Won’t Stop Kissing Her Friends!

 By Dennis, Dr. Neder
 "Being a Man in a Woman's World"

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Hi,

I am in a serious relationship of over one year. Over the course of our relationship, my girlfriend and I have spent most of the time that we have been together without the company of our respective friends. Once in a while we are in a situation where one of my girlfriend's male friends is coming or going and her standard greeting or send off is a kiss on the lips.

I don't kiss anyone on the lips other than my girlfriend. I find it unsanitary. She obviously doesn't. She does insist on all shoes being removed in the apartment and street clothes not being worn on the bed (even on top of the comforter).

I have gone along with her need to feel a sense of cleanliness, but she refuses to discuss her lip-planting all of these guys she is friends with. She says that's just the way she is, and tells me to get over it. I can't. I do not feel respected or comfortable not to mention grossed out!

-Cold Sore Patrol

Hello!

This is ABSOLUTELY a matter of respect (or disrespect on her part)! Just like they say you're having sex with every other partner your girlfriend has had, you're also kissing them too! Further, she's giving you the dreaded "Test"!

If you've read any of my articles, you know that I talk about "The Test" all the time, and it is a matter of utmost importance that you get it handled once and for all, or it's just going to get worse! Regardless of how she sees it, you don't feel comfortable with it, and frankly, that's all that should matter.

To handle this you're going to have to put your foot down and tell her, no more kissing other guys on the lips - period. Further, if she kisses some guy on the lips, you're not going to kiss her until after she takes a bath! You should also have a long talk with her regarding respect. (By the way - I once got a chick I was dating to stop smoking by doing this! She had to fully brush her teeth every time she smoked before I would kiss her - outside of course. What a pain in the ass!)

If this doesn't get you anywhere, you might want to illicit some of your female friend’s help - at least those you'd want to tongue-kiss. Of course, you've got to make sure you do this only in public, and hopefully around her friends, as the humiliation factor is the primary key.

The reason why this is so insidious (and she knows it is!) is that she can easily come back with "but we're only friends - YOU must be insecure!" How do you defend that statement? This is why it is so imperative to get corrected immediately. You might also want to pick up a copy of my book, "Being a Man in a Woman's World" as it goes into handling these kinds of tests in great depth.

Let me know how things turn out, my brother...


Copyright (c) 2005, Dr. Dennis W. Neder All rights reserved. Remington Publications For more information about my book, "Being a Man in a Woman's World", visit: www.remingtonpublications.com P.O. Box 10702 Glendale, CA 91209-3702 (818) 246-2058 Fax (818) 246-5431
About the author
uthor of: Being a Man in a Woman's World
Dedicated to advancing the arts and sciences of relationships.
Start having the relationships YOU deserve!
Got a love, relationship or man/woman question? I answer all letters. You
can write to me at dwneder@remingtonpublications.com
for answers. For more information about my book, "Being a Man in a Woman's
World", visit: www.remingtonpublications.com

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Article Overview
To handle this you're going to have to put your foot down and tell her, no more kissing other guys on the lips - period. Further, if she kisses some guy on the lips, you're not going to kiss her until after she takes a bath!


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