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How-To-Date


Why Are Beautiful Women Crazy?

 By Dennis, Dr. Neder
 "Being a Man in a Woman's World"

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Let's face it - sometimes we men thing ALL women are crazy! The fact is - everyone is crazy sometimes. Yes - even you (maybe ESPECIALLY you - you be the judge). That is, everyone does things that others perceive as crazy. Many women seem to be particularly prone to acts of craziness. Beautiful women are even more so.

What makes beautiful women more likely to be crazy? The simple answer is, that they are given more opportunity to be crazy, and crazy behavior seems to be more readily accepted from them. That is, they learn crazy behavior and that they can get away with it. Further, we men often help them along by allowing (even encouraging) craziness in our relationships with them.

Before we get too deeply into all of this, let's explore some concepts we'll use in a few moments:

* "Crazy" verse "Neurotic"

A psychologist friend of mine says, "Neurotics build castles in the sky, psychotics live in them, and psychologists collect the rent!"

It's important to differentiate "crazy" and "neurotic". Specifically, neurotic behavior can be thought of as individual actions that seem inappropriate, obsessive, or dangerous - particularly in the context of a situation. Crazy behavior is more of a lifestyle and usually involves psychotic activity. It affects almost every aspect of a person's life, and tends to directly impact those that come in contact with the crazy person.

We've all heard jokes about "that time of the month" or "being one boy scout short of a jamboree", etc., but you really need to look closely at a new girlfriend's behavior to see how its going to impact you in the long run. You see, she will probably not start off showing you craziness early in your relationship. If she starts saying or doing crazy things when you first meet her, walk away and don't look back - this is the best she's going to be!

Here are some examples of crazy behaviour:

- Everything is fine until all of a sudden, she goes into a raging fit over nothing important

- She goes through your personal things and then goes ballistic when she finds something inconsequential (note: she shouldn't be looking through anything of yours in the first place - nor should you!)

- She is obsessed with purchasing the perfect belt, handbag or pair of shoes, when she already has closets full of them at home

- Her mood changes constantly

- She is consumed by the fear that someone is watching her, has put a curse on her, or is going to get into a car accident

- She showers 3 times a day, but never works out

It is appropriate to note that men can be crazy too. However, because of societal pressures on men, they don't seem to be crazy (or neurotic) quite as frequently as women. In general crazy behavior is not tolerated as readily in men as in women.

For the remainder of this article, we'll use the word "crazy" to refer to women that are neurotic or mildly crazy - not the clinically insane.

* Best Sex You'll Ever Have

Yes - it's sad but true; you'll never have sex like the sex you get with crazy women. Why? It seems that acting crazy automatically reduces or eliminates concern for the views of others. They get "used to" being viewed by others and learn to ignore it, or even revel in the attention it brings. Thus, the crazy lady is more likely to be open to new ideas, especially sex. However, always remember that crazy women are not necessarily more sexual - this is a common misconception of the past.

The one exception to this is the obsessive woman who focuses too heavily on what people think. However, this tends to be more of a self-image issue than true neurotic behavior.

* Crazy Is As Crazy Does

Actions speak louder than words - it really doesn't matter what she says. In fact, unless you're well versed in translating "Womenese" into English, focus 90 to 95% of your attention on her actions. Watch what she does. Does she need to rub the body of an airplane before she boards it for good luck? Does she make weekly visits to a tarot card reader? Will she avoid making decisions until she gets the advice of "Boots", her cat?

There are many highly intelligent women that are crazy. Why does this make a difference? Because, many of these intelligent women are also usually high-functioning. That is, they; despite their mental states, can proceed through life without severe barriers. They make others around them think that they are perfectly sane and rational. So much so that many people simply brush off their crazy behavior as eccentric.

* You Don't Have To Buy Into It!

I have an adage that I live by - I ignore all neurotic statements made by normal people, and ANY statement made by neurotic people! Remember, regardless of how beautiful she is you don't have to put up with craziness - especially if it impacts your life!

Can you change her? Well, if you're a clinical psychologist, psychiatrist, or other health care professional - maybe. The next question is, should you? Probably not. The time and effort in trying to change someone's behavior that has likely been learned over a lifetime is enormous.

Ok, so what if you're already in a relationship with a crazy woman and you're committed to making it work? First, you should check you own motivations - I know too many men that spend their lives trying to fix their partner's problems. They do this first for their own sense of accomplishment. Then, when they fail it becomes something of a quest - they continue to beat their heads against the wall.

If you still think you can change her, the very first thing you need to do is let her know that you will absolutely not accept any further crazy behavior - in other words, you expect her to act sane. When she beings an "episode", bring her back to reality and have her confirm it. For example, a black cat crosses your path and she freaks, say, "Honey, black cats have no meaning and we left superstition back in the last millennium - right?" Frankly, for some people it is next to impossible, especially if she really has some organic problem. Remember however, we're talking about neurotic women here, not the clinically insane.

What do you do when she slips back into neurotic behavior? Bring the specific action to her attention immediately and remind her that you will not tolerate it. Then, take her home and tell her that when she decides to be rational, she can call you - but not before. In order for this to work, you're going to have to be consistent. If you let your guard down even once, you're opening the door for more of that zaniness, and you'll have to start back at square one.

You should also get her into some type of counselling as quickly as you can. Many productive lives have been saved by a few sessions with someone trained to recognize and redirect neurotic behavior. Neurotic behavior can sometimes get worse if not treated.

Many men, having originally gone for the "10's" are settling for the "7's", "8's" and "9's" in order to get away from all the drama. I also believe that this is at least one of the reasons why you see so many beautiful women on the arms of older guys (besides the obvious - money, power, etc.) These guys are better able to handle all the wackiness of being with these women.

So, what's it going to be - a crazy trophy, or a sane, down to earth pretty girl? You decide.


Copyright (c) 2005, Dr. Dennis W. Neder All rights reserved. Remington Publications www.remingtonpublications.com P.O. Box 10702 Glendale, CA 91209-3702 (818) 246-2058 Fax (818) 246-5431
About the author
uthor of: Being a Man in a Woman's World
Dedicated to advancing the arts and sciences of relationships.
Start having the relationships YOU deserve!
Got a love, relationship or man/woman question? I answer all letters. You
can write to me at dwneder@remingtonpublications.com
for answers. For more information about my book, "Being a Man in a Woman's
World", visit: www.remingtonpublications.com

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Let's face it - sometimes we men thing ALL women are crazy!


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